The following is a new piece I wrote. Before you read please know that it is graphic and it will offend those with stricter sensibilities. It's probably the most heart felt piece I've written about struggle with the despicable nature of my sin and more importantly the One who is my over-comer.
Also, while this poem is directed at Satan and demonic forces, it could also be addressed to my own sinful flesh as well. And as Michael the archangel said I presume no judgment outside what God has willed for Satan and his demons and ultimately my best response is "The Lord rebuke you." (Jude 9)
So you've been warned before you read.
Here you are again, appearing as an angel of light
You start out your offer by inciting me to flight
You want me to run, run and flee from Christ
But like Jesus in the dessert I won't let you entice
You come up behind me and whisper in my ear
You tell me of worldly pleasures hoping I will hear
You tell me how I should return to my old man
And you're so willing and give me a helpin' hand
You tell me that if I'd just turn back to the world that says it's okay to be gay
That I'll be so much happier than I am following the Way.
And you say that if i simply go back you'll make sure I have all I ever wanted
No matter how much I refuse your attacks continue undaunted
To Christ you said turn the rock into bread
And to me you say go on you know can give great head
You offer Jesus to give up the cross for a life of ease
And for me you tempt go on and just stay on my knees.
And when I say that I don't mean to be in prayer
For back then for me to know any truth was really quite rare
Eventually, when your attacks of pleasure don't work
You'll change your tactics from trying to get me to jerk
You'll start your attacks on my character next
Doing what you can to get me anxious and perplexed
It's no longer a whisper but a shout in my face
"You've fallen too much and there's not enough grace."
Or "You've not really changed you're just a fat faggot,
Your God will send you to Hell you pathetic little maggot."
Well Lucifer its true you've tricked me before
And you're right when you say I've been a great whore
You've even tempted me to end my life
And I've often held my wrist to that knife
But here is something you so often forget
You can say all you want but my eternity is set
You can speak all your lies and even half-truths
But I'll thank the I Am like at the Feast of Booths
You may know who I was but you don't know who I am
I'm no longer my own for I've been bought by the Lamb
You may think you have power
But it's your coming hour
When You will be chained
By the king who will reign
And you'll spend your days in a pit
With all the He will spit
Out of His mouth for being lukewarm
So let make sure to inform
You think you know me so well
Well Satan you can just go to Hell
So come on up Apollyon if you really want to fight,
I will not be afraid of you for I know my God is right.
I hold fast to the King's armor of salvation
And cling to the Sword, from the God above creation
And one I'll stand and cheer as I see your final defeat
I have need no to fear you for God's plan He'll complete
You and your demons will have no where to run
When the day finally comes for the return of the Son
So Satan you still think you know me so well?
Think all you want but you can still go to Hell